Love, Healing and Spirit Guidance: Can Our Loved Ones Tell Us Who Is Right for Us?

Can Spirit Tell Us Who We Should Be With?

“Is he/she the right one for me?” is one of the most common questions people ask their loved ones in spirit during a mediumship reading and I completely understand why.

When we stand in front of major life decisions, especially after being broken, betrayed, or disappointed in the past, we long for certainty. We want reassurance that we won’t make the same mistakes again.

I even remember my own therapist once encouraging me to seek guidance from my grandparents in spirit when facing important life decisions.

And honestly, who would we trust more than the people we love most, those who now exist in a place of pure love, wisdom, and greater understanding?

But this is also where we sometimes miss the deeper point of being human.

Why We Are Here to Experience Life Fully

We are here to experience life fully with all its beauty, uncertainty, heartbreak, and growth. These experiences shape us. They help us evolve.

Our loved ones in spirit often guide us gently by bringing through memories, signs, emotions, or reminders of past experiences that help awaken our own inner knowing. They may inspire our judgment, but they cannot make our decisions for us.

That responsibility belongs to us.

And perhaps that is one of the greatest lessons of all.

Heal Before You Seek Love

One of the most important things I have learned personally is this:

Heal first.

Before entering a new relationship, it is important to begin your own healing journey. When you meet someone new, they are not responsible for repairing the wounds created by someone else.

A new relationship deserves a fresh start.

Instead of entering love guarded, fearful, and expecting betrayal, we should strive to show up as our authentic selves: honest, open, self-aware, and willing to grow.

Three Things Not to Do in a Relationship

1. Don’t Let Past Drama Become Emotional Armor

Protecting yourself is natural after pain, but building walls so high that nobody can reach you also blocks genuine love and connection.

2. Don’t Hide Your Authentic Self

Real connection can only happen when we allow ourselves to be seen fully, including our imperfections, dreams, fears, and vulnerabilities.

3. Don’t Neglect Your Own Healing

Your wellbeing matters. Tend to yourself emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically. A healthy relationship starts with the relationship you have with yourself.

Can Love Be Healing Too?

At the same time, I also agree with Dr. Joe Dispenza when he says that love itself can also be healing.

Two imperfect or wounded people can still create a beautiful and meaningful relationship if both are willing to heal individually and grow together.

When two people commit to honesty, communication, self-awareness, and becoming better versions of themselves, something incredibly powerful happens: grace enters the relationship.

But if only one person is doing the emotional work while the other remains unwilling to grow, it often leads to pain and frustration in the end.

When Kindness Feels “Too Good to Be True”

One thing I have personally noticed is that people who have been deeply betrayed in the past sometimes begin to mistrust kindness itself.

When someone shows up consistently, communicates honestly, and treats them with compassion, it can almost feel suspicious, “too good to be true.”

Instead of feeling safe, past trauma makes them wonder:
“What do they really want from me?”
“Why are they being so kind?”
“Is there a hidden motive?”

As someone who is naturally compassionate, transparent, and honest, I have experienced this misunderstanding personally. But often, it has very little to do with us and much more to do with the unresolved pain the other person carries.

And this applies not only to romantic relationships, but also to friendships, family relationships, and even business connections.

Choose the People Who Choose You

Don’t chase the people who don’t want to be with you.

Instead, invest your energy into the people who never want to leave.

The right people will value your presence, your honesty, your effort, and your heart.

Learn to Trust Your Own Heart

Learn to listen to your heart and intuition instead of allowing external fear to control your choices.

Yes, friends, family, our subconscious mind, and even our past experiences often try to protect us. They usually mean well. But love and genuine connection always require vulnerability.

Without vulnerability, we cannot truly experience intimacy, trust, or emotional closeness.

A Simple but Powerful Exercise

Take out your journal and write down the qualities your dream partner should have.

Then ask yourself:
“Am I becoming that person too?”

The kind of love we seek often begins with the energy we embody ourselves.

What Is Meant for You Will Find You

The right person will make an effort to communicate with you, no matter how difficult life becomes.

Because what is truly meant for us will not constantly require us to beg for love, attention, or basic effort.

Sometimes we simply need patience, healing, faith, and trust in divine timing.

Trust in God, the Universe, and your loved ones in spirit.

Life is often working behind the scenes in ways we cannot yet see and somehow, it always has a way of unfolding at exactly the right time.

A Final Message From My Heart

If you are missing a loved one and wish to feel their presence, love, and guidance again, I would be honored to help support you on your healing journey through an Evidential Mediumship reading.

In an Evidential Mediumship reading with me, I connect with your loved ones in spirit and bring through clear, specific evidence, personality traits, and meaningful messages to help you feel their continued presence, love, and guidance in your life.

👉 Looking for guidance from your loved ones in the spirit world? Yes, I want to learn more about Evidential Mediumship Readings.